In this campus commentary, I will be talking about Davidson Student Laura Bullock’s art exhibit GOOSECHASE, which took place in the Belk Visual Arts Center in March of 2023.
In her search for a romantic relationship, she describes often experiencing abusive, narcissistic, and partners with poor communication. As a result, she settled multiple times on a person who doesn’t treat her correctly and justly the way in which she deserves to be. She admits, too, that as a result of pursuing a relationship that may not have been the best idea at the time as an attempt to fulfill her needs, it caused severe emotional damage to her. Therefore, her exhibit’s goal is to bring visibility and understanding within her audience to the consequences of assault, whether it be verbal, emotional, or physical. Bullock displays her work through mixed media paintings and pastel drawings to portray the variety of emotions that come with abuse and emotional trauma. Repeated abandonment in contrast with some of her paintings depicting a woman laughing highlight the irony of her situation where she continuously looks for partnership for those who cannot give or provide her with that.
Her goal with the exhibit is to create a spiritual landscape that interacts with animals with nude portraits of women that depict, according to her, “the comedic discrepancy between what I want and what I can get”. In contrast, she utilizes harsh and aggressive paint strokes showing up as marks on the painting which displays the chaos of her trauma and its mark on her life. She adds contrasting colors in her paintings, with bright hues of blue and red to display the ways in which she attempts to fight and cope with the trauma with the bright aspects of her life, but the scars still remain in her as she combats and heals her wounds. Bullock speaks of the multiple creatures in her artwork along with her own encounters with animals, which she highlights, are “spiritual messengers”, each with specific meanings. Many of her compositions include animal myths and tarot cards where their behavior determines the specific places in which she feels sexually exploited, rejected, and struggles to not feel helpless in situations during her relationships. Additionally, the various animal figures that appear calm to the viewer's eye are significant in representing the way in which her choices during chaotic events in her life numbed her to become “blissfully unaware” of what was truly going on. Bullock says she mocks herself in some of the illustrations of her paintings to convince the audience of the severity of the pain she’s experienced in the past and is still experiencing in the present. She successfully expresses her vulnerability and brings about a sense of self-awareness as she exposes her inner thoughts and world to the audience that views her exhibition.
One painting in particular, titled “Inner Child”, depicts a nude woman stretching her arms to what comes for her. Surrounded by animals that remind her of her childhood, which includes owls, cranes, squirrels, deer and other birds, she’s as free as they are. Her childhood and life isn’t yet tarnished by the difficulties and traumas of being in an abusive relationship. She hasn’t navigated or gone through the “real” hardships of life as she slowly distances herself from her innocent childhood where its blissfulness brings out her inner self without having to constantly shield herself and block any vulnerability in her adult, college life. Another interesting part of her exhibition involved drawing a card from a spread of cards, checking the book below the cards for the corresponding image which contains a message inside. Looking through the book, each page contained an image of an animal, like a white-tailed deer for example, and a brief description of its symbolism which in this case “reminds us that even if we aren’t seeing or feeling it all the time, the magic of imperceptible worlds touches our lives everyday”. Below the handwritten message on each page additionally, was an affirmation, which in this page said: “I am seen and guided even when I feel lost”. This part of her exhibition drew the audience closer into her personal life in the form of another coping mechanism that mixes art and journaling together, giving us insight into what she used to express her feelings in creating art.
Laura Bullock’s art exhibit was relatable in many aspects. There is a saying that art is never actually completed, it's just the artist that has decided to pause on the work. Bullock may come back to it after months or even years of healing and reshape the future of the art. I find art to be a fascinating outlet because it lets the artist or creator express themselves more freely with an accessibility to more mediums and textures that speak differently to various individuals or groups. It gives the opportunity for one to let out any emotions and process them as well whether they’re sad, hopeful, comedic, and/or melancholic ones. Whether or not an artist is successful in their works I think is completely up to them since in this case, Bullock’s art is about her personal life which no one knows better to express through art than herself. Respectfully, being in a space and seeing the creation of someone in the same college as me who experienced severe emotional trauma, touches me even more in knowing and seeing the effects of abusive relationships on individuals. It is deeply saddening to also know individuals personally who have experienced abuse in relationships and the ways in which they have used various coping mechanisms in an attempt to heal their trauma wounds. Therefore, it is essential to recognize, whether it involves a friend or loved one advising against a potential partner, of any signs of potential abuse and reach out to trusted individuals in helping navigate and get out of a worsening situation.
If you or anyone you know is in an abusive situation, make sure to check up on them, be there for them, listen and comfort them in moments of despair, let them know you will be there for them, while also checking in on yourself, making sure you are able to handle and cope with forthcoming adversities. Find an outlet to process your emotions.
“There is no timestamp on trauma. There isn’t a formula that you can insert into to get from horror to healed. Be patient. Take up space. Let your journey be the balm. ~ Dawn Serra
